GOODBYE GRASSHOPPER
***********************
"Grasshopper" was a term of endearment that the the wise old Chinese teacher called Caine, in the old "Kung -Fu" televison series.
"Choose wisely Grasshopper," was a phrase from the show that first came to mind as Odin Odinson gave his toddler Thor, choices rather than telling him precisely what to do in almost every situation.
Friends thought it odd that a Norwegian would give his son a nick-name that was associated with Zen and the Orient.
"Not odd at all," he would tell them, "I want my son to know he always has choices; and that it is the choices he makes, that will determine his destiny. Even the "gods" operate by giving us free will. I do not see this truth as belonging to a particular race or nationality. When I call him "Grasshopper" it reminds me: give him choices, not dictates."
******************
The name served him well, and consequently, Grasshopper was always a thoughtful sensitive youngster, who was unusual as kids go, but unforgettable and a credit to the world in which he lived.
*********************
When "Grasshopper" graduated from Concord Academy, Ms. Poe, his favorite teacher came to the graduation picnic on Walden Pond. (1)
Before leaving, she asked Grasshopper to stop over and sign the graduates and friends guest book.
"I have a surprise there for you."
"Great. Let's go right now."
Taking her hand, he walked over with her to the table. Knowing her, he waited for further instructions.
"Now close your eyes," she told him.
Reaching under the table she retrieved two small gift bags and hid them behind her back.
"Pick a hand Grasshopper, right or left."
"Ms. Poe, since you already know I'm a lefty, I'll pick your right hand."
In it he found a rolled-up scroll with a red ribbon around a copy of "Acres Of Diamonds."
"You will enjoy it later when I assign it to you--ask you to write a report--link it to our Human Sexuality Class. By the way, you're going to need that class this summer for your final graduation credit, you're one short."
Squeezing her hand he said, "Then you haven't forgotten then?"
"No, of course not. I keep my promises."
"You know, Ms. Poe, that alone would be gift enough from you, the best gift of all . . . ."
Blushing, she handed him the second gift, a framed copy of "Lessons Learned."
Inscribed on top in red, green, and 14K gold calligraphy it read, "Goodbye Grasshopper."
"Wow, thanks Ms. Poe."
She proceeded to point to this and that, explaining the art of calligraphy and how the white birch bark on the frame was from the tree they'd sit and talk beneath at recess.
Ten months previous, as they sat under that tree, Grasshopper had wanted to talk about sex, but Ms. Poe refused. Instead, she promised to teach him a class in Human Sexuality, AFTER he graduated, PROVIDING he'd memorize "Lesson's Learned."
Without either of them saying it, he knew the white birch bark was symbolic of the promise she had made him under the big white birch--that it was her way of saying she intended to follow through.
*********************
Twelve years older than Grasshopper--Ms. Poe had been far more than his teacher and student advocate for the past four years. She'd become a substitute family for him.
His parents, Odin and G. Jordi Odinson were both Oxford Scholars, brilliant scientists involved in the Cern (2) Project and living in Geneva, Switzerland. As much as they loved their Grasshopper, on a day to day basis, they had little time for anything, other than their scholarly pursuits.
After an extensive background check on Ms. Poe, Odin and Jordi left their fifteen year old son in Concord, Massachusetts at the academy with the private understanding between themselves and Ms. Poe, that she would be given power of attorney and oversee the details of their son's personal life, health and education.
They were satisfied and relieved when Ms. Poe agreed to stand in for them. They were confident by this time that she would be ideal for their son--give him understanding and affection they could not--be his advocate and do everything possible to be supportive of him both personally and educationally.
At their last interview Ms. Poe came up with the idea of Grasshopper viewing her as a family member, a "big sister." His parents thought this was a great idea and liked it too, that he'd only be 12 miles from Harvard where they hoped he would eventually be accepted.
The day they left him, Ms. Poe gave his parents an unexpected bonus. She agreed to take him to Harvard as often as possible--acquaint him with the campus and faculty when she attended alumni gatherings throughout the year.
**********************
From ninth to eleventh grade, she grew to love Grasshopper and felt in her heart, she was his big sister and he was the brother she had never had.
What had started out for Ms. Poe, as an altruistic deed, became a priceless gift to
herself.
But all that changed Labor Day Weekend, as her charge was about to enter his senior year at Concord.
**********************
Because Grasshopper had been held back a grade in elementary school, he was 18, when as a a junior he left for a summer in Europe with Concord Academy's French Club.
While he was gone, he sent her postcards from which she gathered that the trip was fun and a valuable experience for him--just as she expected it would be.
What she NEVER expected, was what followed while picking him up at the airport on his return to the United States!
She DID NOT recognize him.
There he sat, but it took her awhile. He was no longer a gangly unsure boy, but instead, a breath taking hunk!
The boy had turned into a drop-dead knock-out Norse Viking--a god--like being who looked for all the world, like Thor, the legendary god and Marvel Comic Book hero
********************
A few days later Grasshopper's image popped into what could only be described as a mind blowing wet dream.
She woke up with her heart pounding out of her chest.
Feeling ashamed and confused, she asked whatever guardian angel he might have to forgive her for having such a totally inappropriate dream.
Still off and on throughout that day she couldn't help but wonder if in real life, he'd feel that mind-blowing good.
*******************
Had they lived in some European nation, it would have been another matter. Neither the boy, or anyone else, would mind if she'd now assume the responsibility to teach an 18 year old about sex and love him well with a 'hands-on' approach.
It made her wet just thinking about it and despite her conscience bitching at her in the background, her lust for Grasshopper finally won out and she masturbated that next night with a cock-size buttered up zucchini from the school kitchen and let herself imagine it was him on top of her-- it turned out to be the best orgasm she'd ever had in her life.
Afterwards as she showered, she still had shock waves going on between her legs that were strong enough to make her want to go get him, jump a plane and take him to the South of France to fuck him on foreign soil.
But in the morning reality hit her in the gut. Grasshopper was her responsibility, and she knew that she must remain faithful to his best overall interests, that in realty, she would never take advantage of a student--least of all-- her dearest sweetest friend in all the world.
Besides, she told herself, he'd have many women throughout his life who'd no doubt adore his manly attribute, but very few, who would love him like she did, adore his heart and mind, lay down her life for him.
Maybe in my next life, she thought,
I'll get lucky, find all three--in someone like my Grasshopper.
******************
Thanking her for her gifts, Grasshopper got up from the picnic table and gave Ms. Poe a hug saying, "I better put these in my car right now."
"Good idea, Grasshopper. Regrettably, I must leave now for another party. Thank you for inviting me."
"Thank you for coming. Will I see you next week at the Farmer's Market?"
"Oh, yes. I have to eat. Check up on YOU too. Oh, one more thing before I go, I want you to do me a favor. Memorize 1-8 of Lessons Learned, and remember, don't read Acres of Diamonds until I assign it to you."
***************************
When he returned home the next day, Grasshopper, wanting to please Ms.Poe and at the same time do as he promised, went to work on memorizing "Lessons Learned."
****************
As usual, during the summers, their meetings at Walden Pond were replaced with walks along the bike path that ran behind the Farmer's Market, or in among the grocery carts in the parking lot, where Grasshopper would carry bags of fresh produce to her car for the summer school's daily buffet.
As they walked side by side, he couldn't help but notice how beautiful she was, a woman in full bloom who was a born teacher, but more importantly, as beautiful inside, as she was outside, his dear friend, his mentor, the love of his life.
That helped him tolerate her sometimes aggravating insistence on teaching him--that which cannot be taught--truisms that she felt compelled to tuck away in his mind for the rainy days that were sure to come into his life.
**********************
Preparing a lesson plan for Human Sexuality she assured him, that it'd be all he'd need to get started someday with "Introductory Sex 101" and that although her course might appear difficult at first, it would simply be a platform from which he would launch his own experiences with various lovers he would enjoy throughout his lifetime.
"In time," she told him, "You'll find what works best for you, but keep in mind, that sex with yourself, or no sex, is usually better in the long run for you, than having sex without love to nourish it and bless it.
"At least this is my educated guess," she told him, "but I am biased as I have never had sex without being at least a little bit in love."
She had Grasshoppers full attention
in more ways than one.
"Have you had many lovers Ms. Poe?"
"No, I haven't, at least not yet."
"Ms. Poe. I know you love me, does that mean you would make love to me?"
"Grasshopper, before I answer that, let me continue with this part of your lesson. Then after you've read the written portion I have prepared for you, we'll talk.
You're nineteen now, so I feel free to discuss this with you as a mentor. I asked your parents and they said it was fine, and that to use my own judgement."
"Okay, Ms. Poe, that's fair."
"Grasshopper, I should amend what I'm saying here by adding that I'd like to see you finish your assignments with Lessons Learned and personally explore and experience Number 5:
"The greatest builder of confidence is the ability to do something, almost anything, well."
"I understand Ms. Poe. Tell me more."
"First, as in the physician's oath, when it comes to sex, do no harm.
Then as much as possible, do everything with love, beauty and grace.
Always be gentle and caring in everything you do. Gentleness brings joy.
If you and your partner want sex that is NOT gentle, make sure it comes from mutual consent and that you have pre-established "safe words" that put on the brakes if sex becomes frightening or painful.
Always remember to never take advantage of anyone just because you can."
"I never would, Ms. Poe."
"Yes Grasshopper, in my heart
I know that. It's not in your nature to find pleasure at the expense of another."
"I will remember your words and seek to enjoy the excitement of sex, but only with mutual consent."
"That's good, Grasshopper. I know you will bring joy and love to others in all you do. I don't have all the answers, far from it, but as a guideline, I have written out a brief syllabus and enclosed it in the envelope along with a letter to you. You will notice also, there are several books I have assigned, that'll require you to write a book report. I hope you consider everything in this short course carefully before you leave Walden Pond and venture forth into the world."
With that she handed him a big brown envelope. On the front it read:
"Human Sexuality 101"
*********************
He waited until he returned to his room before opening it up.
He'd hoped he'd find a key card to her suite at the academy but as soon as he opened it and shook out the contents, he knew that fantasy was dead.
Out of curiosity, more than joy, he settled in to read it all.
Dear Grasshopper,
When it comes to sex, love everyone you can, all of your life and strive to express that love appropriately and within whatever value system and moral code your conscience dictates.
Be flexible, but firm in your convictions, if change is warranted, change slowly and with care.
Remember that all love is one love, heartfelt. Some people call it spiritual love; the only differences are in how you choose to channel your love to others.
You're likely to love your child, your mother, your spouse with the same "amount" of love, but the difference is in how that love is appropriately expressed
to each individual.
And this is what separates human beings from the animal world--being responsible and thinking before you act.
Consider having sex with only those you "truly love" it will help you to discern and do the right thing.
Be prepared. Protect yourself and those you make love with. Condoms in your wallet are a good idea, especially if you're impulsive.
You may have only felt love for a person for a short while, a few hours, a few days, but make sure it IS love at some level. If only for five minutes.
They won't necessarily know, but YOU will. And of course, never force your will upon anyone in anyway.
And if you ever do, ask forgiveness and forgive yourself. Do better next time. Above all, make sure you commit no crime or break no laws.
May this help you in some small way as you go forth into the world.
You will not be tested on this lesson. Life will give you a battery of tests.
Be satisfied with "more or less" and work with what you have.
Practice being content and grateful for that which comes your way. Don't be afraid to peacefully seek that which does not.
Don't be hard on yourself. Treat yourself as good as you would your best friend.
I have faith in your integrity and goodness and know you will do well and make me proud of you.
Affectionately,
Ms. Poe
******************
Grasshopper continued to practice the daily memorization as assigned by Ms. Poe, every day he would read them and say them back from memory.
LESSON'S LEARNED
by G. Dean (b. 1905)
*******************
1. Never lose your capacity for enthusiasm
2. Never lose your capacity for indignation.
3. Never judge people to quickly; but in a pinch, always first assume that a person is good, and that at the worst, he or she is in the grey area between good and bad.
4. If you can't be generous when it is hard, you won't be when it is easy.
5. The greatest builder of confidence is the ability to do something, almost anything, well.
6. When that confidence comes, then strive for humility, you aren't as good as all of that.
7. And the way to become truly useful, is to seek the best that others have to offer. Use them to supplement your own, and give credit to them when they have helped.
8. The greatest tragedies in the world and personal events stem from misunderstandings.
Answer: communicate.
**********************
Ms. Poe's gifts were a mental struggled for him, to absorb it all and relate it to his life.
But it was Number 5 that bugged him the most: "The greatest builder of confidence is the ability to do something, almost anything, well." That one hurt.
Searching his brain repeatedly, he couldn't find one thing that he could honestly tell himself he did, well.
*********************
Frustrated, Grasshopper phoned Ms. Poe and explained he was having trouble with Number 5 of Lessons Learned.
"Ms. Poe, That Number 5 . . . I need your help with it. It seems critical to the whole, but it eludes me, troubles me. I'm not getting it."
"Yes, Grasshopper, that is very perceptive of you. Number 5 was difficult for me also. In a few days, I will be freed up and we can meet to discuss your progress further. In the meantime I will send you a message that will share with you my personal struggle with Number 5.
******************
To Be Continued:
Goodbye Grasshopper
(Part 2: Conclusion)
Footnotes:
(1)Walden Pond State Reservation
(2) CERN The European Organization for Nuclear Research: world's largest particle physics lab on the Franco-Swiss border, Birth Place: World Wide Web/LHC
|
Submitted by:
Babe
view profile
|
You have new unread mail messages!
Click here for your Inbox!
