Poetic Justice A Nowel in Part2
"F#ck Dat" I sung a long to the lyrics of ADHD as I finished rolling up, giving the blunt a final lick. I admired my work. Just to think not too long ago I couldnt even spilt a dutch. My joint was packed and tight.
I took a decent sip from my Mariyln flask before grabing my rasta lighter. Of course I had to restart ADHD. That's my favorite track to smoke to. I strongly inhaled letting the smoke it the back of my throat and slowly allowed it to travel to my lungs. I liked to imagine the smoke covering my mind like a velvet cloth or something. I made sure to hold my smoke before blowing out. I felt like holding it in just gave it a sexier more robust effect.
My roommate and best friend Mykel walked into the room. So you know I'm about to mess with him. "Nigga don't blow my high!" I screamed out with the song, the mary j starting to take a little effect.
"I see you just turningg up this morning." He replied spraying some AXe spray on himself. He was in uniform.
"Unlike yourself, I have no work today." I left it at that but I did have some moves I needed to make. If I only relied on that crummy McDonald's pay then I would never have enough for anything.
"You really need to pick up some more hours though. At this point..."
I knew Mykell cared about me but sometimes he really knew how to sound like a father and work my nerves. "Omg, am I late on bills? Am I in lack? Dont worry, I got this."
My phone went off.
Apart of me didn't even want to answer the shit when I saw Aaron name pop up on the screen. And you know what, I didnt. F#ck that n!gga. I dont even need to spaek to him today on some real ish he erked my nerves at certain points and right now I didnt want him blowing my high at all.
He seemed to give up quickly. No text. No second call. No voicemail. And a part of me felt terrible because I did want him to care. Well I think I want him to care. I feel like after f#cking him every night raw on a constant basis I should want him to care...that maybe he should care. Or did I feel like I wanted him to care because something told me we should.
Regardless I know soon I wont be happy with how my life is going. Money was okay. Sex is amazing with Aaron but sex doesnt hold you when you're cold. Sex doesn't care when tears are falling from your eyes. But right now I had bomb as sex with Aaron and a good friendship when we werent arguing...which was begining to be often.
Trying to figure out my rights and wrongs were frustrating. I had to get it together soon but today isnt going to be that day so my goal: Be mother f#cking happy where I am.
I will be damned if I drive myself insane trying to figure out some sh!t that eventually was going to show it's self. I just need to be prepared for my concequences. Apart of me thinks I wont be but the other part knows I will take it. That's how I'm built. I'm a strong person and there are too many weak b!tches and n!ggas out here right now...I will handle mine. If sh!t requires me to be at 100 and I'm at the bottom....I'll get it together and perform perfect at 110.
I have no choice. And that's what seperates me from these flimsy people out here.
In the car with Frenchy. Wait, did y'all catch the eye roll? I swear I hated this nigga sometimes and sometimes he has me a little worried, but I'm focused. He was a small fry when it came to getting paper because he was one of those little mansion white boys they like to put more product up his nose than in his pockets.
However he had the connects thoughhhhh so that's the only reason I put up with him besides flipping his little money he got from his parents. Now another thing I liked about the Ohio trips were seeing my little boo Derek :)
He was a cute little robin thicke type white boy with goldish blondish hair and he dressed nice and always smelled good.
I remember the first time we met:
I came out the bathroom with my curly Afro popping, full make up done, and my thong and bra on. Body was lotioned and glowing and you know I keep the smell right. I was rocking my can can perfume.
I got a little fright when I realized someone was in the bedroom.
"Um hey" I said. Not in no shy way cause um a sistah heart pumps no cool aid plus I was a little buzzed had smoked a blunt in the shower.
That the first time I saw that little sexy half smile he does. "Sup ma" his golden brown eyes scanned my body.
I won't lie I pokes things out a little. A sister is kinda petite so I have to make the best of my curves.
"You tell me" I responded with a little sexy attitude. Biting my lip to prevent smirking because I knew he was feeling ya girl hard. I won't lie I was liking his little swag.
"Oh so what you want to be up?"
I walked over to him real sexy and leaned over looking him in his lust clouded eyes before whispering in his ear " first this money"
I moved back and he licked his lips. " oh don't worry ma , I've got that"
"Derek!" We both looked towards the door. That just be his little Asian girlfriend Tanya .
"You better go. I don't do well with drama." I dropped my bra .
"You the craziest tease" he said with his hand on the door.
"You like it though"
Ugh Frenchy took me out of my thoughts. We never can just have a silent ride picking up this product. "What's up!"
"Whatcha smiling about? You wanna talk or something?"
I rolled my eyes and scrunched my face up. "Really nah, I told your ass last night I didn't wanna come today. I don't feel good and I'm tired. You sitting here acting like you can't make a simple drop by yourself,"
He also was he reason I didn't see Aaron last night and we argued and I still have to deal with that problem. I know Aaron been feeling neglected since I started selling cause I'm hustling all hours it isn't like before. But I been feeling neglected and I'm hearing rumors he fuck with crystal any way so what.
"You act like you never want to be around me anymore"
I looked at him sideways "the fuck you think I moved out the mansion for?! I get tired of you bitching like you my nigga or wateva checking me and shit"
"Yeah you one sorry mutha f(u)ka "
I answered my phone. It was the novio :Jaron .
Of course I couldn't answer right nowwwww but I definitely hit the send message button :
Hey, doing some work. I'll see you tonight?
Okay now I knowwwwww somebody reading this thinking "whore" and maybe you right. I'm not about to try to justify my behavior to anyone. I mean everything began happening so quickly that I didn't notice the numbers racking up.
I will say it all started because Aaron and I was doing the whole friends with benefits thing then I met jaron and we started kicking it and I really liked him but in a crazy way my boyfriend was the side piece and the friend with benefits was the main. And I guess that left me as the hoe I guess.
"See you never listen to me! You always texting someone else or talking to someone else or leaving" Frenchy had a tight grip on the steering wheel.
"Look calm down. For real the whole problem is you have some feelings you need to check. I'm not your girl. You clocking me like you should be clocking this money and maybe then we could deal with each other better "
"You're right." He turned pandora on.
I was glad for the silence.
Jaron pulled up.
I hopped in the car and a sudden nervousness hit me. Like no one ever makes me feel nervousness but something about this man just puts me on edge and maybe it's the fact that he's better than me. I really don't know what he ever saw in me.
He's older than me...he's 27 and I'm 19. He has a career working in the capital building. He's the kind of nigga that wears a suit everyday where as I'm in street wear.
He's supposed to be with one of those bogy chicks that keep their hair pressed and designer labels on. Not a chick who work at mc Donald's going nowhere fast who deal drugs on the side (nah he don't know that).
"Am I getting a kiss...a bae I missed you.... Anything?" Jaron looked me dead in my eyes.
"You know I missed you baby. "
I leaned over and pressed my lips to him. I liked kissing him but I'm not going to lie that kiss from Aaron was on my mind hard. It's hard to really be kissing someone else when every time I close my eyes that Fuckery present.
"Can we just go to the house. I'm tired and just want to relax." I slipped my hand into his. He smiled. I course he smiled he knows he getting the business.
"You read my mind. But first we have to go pick up the food."
"I can't believe you got all this food from Olive Garden!" I laughed at jay (jaron)
He smiled. "You know how your ass be when I ask you when you're hungry. It takes us driving for an hour to make up your mind but I know you love Olive Garden so I just got everything you might want to eat."
"Thank you baby!" I leaned over and pecked him on the lips. We were sitting on the floor across from each other. The lights were off and he had lit a couple candles on the mantle piece. He had some slow 80's r&b playing in the back ground on pandora.
I'm not going to lie. I was loving the whole vibe jay was giving off tonight. At the same time it was a little uncomfortable because I wasn't used to him being like this. If I had to say the major flaw with jay was....I would say it was him being emotionally unavailable.
He had deepened the kiss and when I pulled away we were just looking into each others eyes in silence. Sometimes I just wished I could run into jays arms and stay there in this strange peace. I will say I always felt safe in his arms.
"Stand up" that was another thing about jay. His ass was just a little bossy but then I won't front like i don't like it.
I stood like he asked. He put his arms around my waist gently swaying from side to side. I put my arms around his neck. How didn't I notice how good he smelled tonight. I think he's wearing ck one.
I rest my head on his shoulder on comfortable silence. This is a little weird for jay. Normally he's not this soft and romantic with me. He's more like the flip your ass over and pull your hair type. But I have to admit I like this side too.
His lips found their way back to mine as ready for the world love you down played. He but my bottom lip making me moan a little.
I kissed him deeper feeling his fingers tangle in my hair. His grip was firm on me I wasn't going anywhere even if I wanted to and no I didn't want to.
He lifted me effortlessly and I locked my legs around his waist as he led me to the bedroom gently placing me on the bed. Okay pause I looked up at him a little perplexed. Where was this side coming from?
I didn't have much time to keep thinking because he was sliding every inch inside of me painfully slow. Sh!t I'm still trying to figure out when my thing came off.
"F*ck....bae" I moaned throwing my head back. My walls were already pulsing around his situation.
"Who's p#ssy is it" he groaned in my ear.
Yo I'm feeling lost. I'm talking about eyes rolling in the back of my head, whimpering and moaning. I usually don't like it slow like this but I'm just focused on pulling him deeper. This is feeling too good.
"F#ck.... It's yours jay" I said knowing this was on another level cause I'm sitting here Lying smh.
"Uh uh tell me it's all mine now."
"Bae it's all yours...oh sh!t"
I felt my legs shaking as he held me closer to him. My stomach started getting that clenching feeling. Right before I came he asked me something I don't even know but I was biting my lip shaking my head yes with tears of pleasure flowing down my cheeks and jodeci playing.
Later on around 12 midnight I'm laying in bed. Jay sleeping next to me. And sticky ish running down my thighs as I remember that question clean 'can I c#m in you'
Omg and me being dumb I said yes. Man....I don't know what this about to mean for me.
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