2:00 AM another sleepless night awaits the dawn.
Thoughts fill my head as I stare into blackness.
A stranger lays beside me, no longer recognizable as the woman I married long ago.
Thoughts of the life I have now...trapped...lonely...sad.
Words of kindness and love replaced long ago by snide remarks or no words at all.
Guilt eats away at me as I think of ending this charade... to give up...to walk away.
Guilt eats away at me for my desire to be happy, a desire to give my love to someone and to have love giving in return.
I think of what could have been years ago if only I said I love you.
I think of the happiness I let slip away.
I think of the happiness that could lay ahead If only I had the courage to take it. I won't make the same mistake twice.
So many thoughts race through my head on these sleepless nights. Thoughts filled with lust, desire, fear and guilt.
What if this is all there is...what if there is no happiness,no joy. With these thoughts I die a little each day, slowly eating away at me untill there is nothing left
I know not what the future holds
I only know I'm a tortured sole
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Submitted by:
jstlookn
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