I'm not exactly sure if it was the three beers turning into sugar inside my stomach or the pain of saying goodbye in my chest but either way it was the push I needed to say what I said. The two men playing pool in front of me were long time friends and it had been a while since we could come together again. You see, Kraig fancied himself in love with me, and I fancied myself in love with Chris. And Chris, well he fancied himself fucked. It took a year for it to blow over but here we were. Kraig had a Barbie doll clone of a girlfriend and Chris openly flirted with me, I'm not going to lie, it was kind of nice. But neither had known what I was going through, nor were they going to.
I lit another cigarette and inhaled the smoke of the menthol. Chris walked up to me and tried to hand me the pool stick. "It's your turn to play," he says, taking the cigarette out of my hand and took a hit.
I look up at him through my red and black bangs and tell him I don't want to, but he insists. So I say, "Or, we could go to your house and we could have sex. I'm not sure if you remember this but I'm better at sex than pool." He looks at me for a few seconds in shock before he replies,
"Or we could do that." He puts the pool-stick back in the cluster and patted Kraig on the back in goodbye. Taking my keys out of my pocket I get off my barstool and walk towards the exit where he is waiting with the door open for me. I ask him if he has condoms and he says he thinks so, he knows so, and I tell him good, because he didn't live as close to Sheetz as he did last year. Small talk fills the short car ride to the house where he lives with our two friends Don and Laurie, a stuck in the 80's type of couple that were good people.
I feel the back of my neck with my hand as we climb the stairs and push myself into the next room. In an attempt to be romantic Chris lit a candle before he reached for me and we rolled together onto the bed. As his lips met mine I remembered how good of a kisser he was and how bad of breath he had. But I ignored it, hitching my leg over his hip and moving him under me. Taking control, I pulled off his shirt, then mine. I want us naked quickly, my aggression wasn't toning down any and I needed to dig my nails into his skin, feel his hips move with mine. Not easily, not gently. Roughly.
Finally clothes were off and the condom on he grabs my ankle and pulls me to him, telling me to get on top. But I fight it, my legs just as strong as his and he forfeits the fight when he thrusts inside me and I let out an erotic cry. One hand on my hip and the other buried in my short hair he lets me wrap his legs around hips so we can move together better, faster. When I think I've won the position fight he pulls a fast one on me and rolls over, still inside me, and I am straddling him now. I growl a protest but go with it, picking up speed with my hips and realize that I now have better control.
His bed is old and the sound of the squeaking frame and mattress is surely waking up Don and Laurie but we both just say fuck it and continue. As we continue to fuck I keep looking out of the corner of the eye, out the window. The moon was in perfect view. He reaches up to me and kisses me, breaking me free of the moon's pull, and tells me he wants to bend me over the bed. I consent immediately, hoping that once I'm in that position we can go faster, harder. But of course he doesn't and minutes later when he cums and were both out of breath he holds me. I'm still on the edge of the bed but my back is erect now and his one arm is around my waist while the other was across my breasts. His lips were planting kisses in my hair, on my ear and neck and though it feels nice, I'm not really paying attention.
During the course of coitus his phone had vibrated incessantly, so while he took care of that I lit another cigarette and lay down on the bed, facing the window, the moon. It was the first quarter, in five days it would be full and I would find her. She would have to run, just like I would and I would find her. For the past few weeks I had been too nice, too eager to back down. But that wasn't going to happen anymore. She had disappeared from not only me, but everyone and I knew she was alive. And I knew she was close, just not seen. Once wolves taste each other they can always sense each other. Chris comes behind me and pulls me into him but I fight it, telling him I need to go home. He wants me to stay, and if I was the nice girl I used to be, I would have, just to make him happy. But I wasn't going to be nice anymore. It was time for a new me.

"So what did you do last night?" It was the next morning and my friend Brad and I were in line at Starbucks. I smiled politely at the cashier and ordered a caramel macchiato, handing her my card. Brad gave his order next and as we waited for our coffee. "So?" He asked again, the sharp blueness of his eyes trailing up and down me.
"Went to the bar, watched the hockey game. Drank some beers with the boys and played some pool. What about you?"
"Oh you watched the game? What was the score?" He had a weird look about him and I started to wonder what he was getting at.
"It was 4-3, we won in the shootout. What's up with you, you're acting strange." The barista handed us our coffees and we started to walk away.
"Nothing's wrong with me, something's up with you. You're wearing a dress today Buddy. I think something else may have happened besides hockey and pool."
I look down at bohemian dress that fell just above my knees and reply, "So? I'm allowed to wear dresses, you can wear a dress for all I care." I take a sip of my coffee and know what he's getting at. But I'm not going to tell him anything, let him make his own conclusions. He picks a table away from everyone else and sits down, so I slide into the chair opposite him.
"You never wear dresses anymore, you've been more masculine lately. So it's kind of weird seeing you dress as a- well, a girl."
So that was it. I couldn't be mad at him, it was the truth. Ever since she had left I had been more into my masculine side and dressing the part of a boy. Maybe it was the whole having sex with a man thing but when I woke up this morning I felt like looking like a woman. That and the full moon was only a few days away now and wearing a lot of clothing made me uncomfortable. But he can't know that, just like he can't know I had sex with Chris last night, so I look down shyly, letting my long eyelashes sweep my cheeks and feel the blush rise. I answer, "Well, maybe she'll be back today."
His mischievous eyes fill with sadness and he opens his mouth to say something, but decides against it. Shutting his mouth he just nods and takes another sip of coffee. He knows she's not going to come back today. I know that too. But for now, I still have to play the heart broken victim like I always am. Always was. I killed her the other day, and the new me slipped in, fitting into the body perfectly, better than that mouse of a woman ever did, and I loved the feel of me. The heavy breasts, the small waist and sexy hips, oh and this body was blessed with an amazing ass. I don't know why she never showed off her body before, but it was mine now, and I could do whatever I wanted to it.
Looking up at him sweetly I let a playful smile steal across his lips and see a reaction of desire. "I'm going to be okay, I promise. It's just going to take time." He smiles back at me and nods.
"That's my girl, now let's go to class!" He stood up, offering his hand to me to assist me in rising and even though I want to swat it away, I take it and giggle as he says come madam, let's away,' in an old English accent.
The next few days were a blur. My body filled with frantic energy like it always did before the full moon and I spent most of my time in the gym working out or running, trying to burn the energy. Chris had called about seven times each day but I ignored them. He had served his purpose, and I felt as if there was no longer a use for him.
After the gym I would slip into the old gymnasium across campus to shower. Almost no one was ever in there and the hot water never ran out. Standing under the cascade of heat I would drag the blade of my pocket- knife over the flesh of my hip, watching the blood well up and trickle down to the apex of my legs before it would heal and the scratch would disappear. I did it over and over again in different places, but always coming back to my left hip. I fed off the pain like the monster I was and embraced that there was nothing left inside me that was good. Everything in me was dark, dead...beaten. I thought I could take it, fight it, and still be bathed in light- but I was wrong.
I was sliding the blade back over my hip again when I felt it, the presence of a wolf. Not just any wolf, but her. I wait, the water still pouring over me, listening for her. It's not until she slides the shower curtain away that I know exactly where she is. Honestly I did not expect this and I waited, frozen, for her to say something. Her once blue eyes fazed into molten gold through heavy lids as she steps closer to me. I look straight into her eyes but that doesn't mean I wasn't taking in her perfect breasts, her beautiful hips, the adorable short cut of her black hair.
Her breathing is becoming heavier and even though every part of my body wants to envelop her I refrain. She steps closer, lips parted, and whispers, "I can't help it...I cant stay away from you." She lunges toward me, throwing me into the shower wall and starts devouring me with her mouth. I meet her readily, my teeth tugging at her lips in a new type of hunger. It was the day of the full moon and if we let our emotions run too wild we can sometimes start to change before the moon rises. At that moment love, lust, anger were all running through me and I could barely fight the change that was trying to grapple my body. My nails were growing long and sharp, and so was hers. Needless to say we were making a bloody mess of each other.
Her name...her name is never going to touch this story. She's strong to begin with, but being so close to the change made her stronger. Her hands gripped my backside, her nails tearing the flesh as she pushes up and lifts me onto the wall. Both of our fangs were protruding and she punctured my nipple as she suckled it. I cried out in the greatest type of pleasure as she lifted me even higher, my back against the wall, my legs spread, as she delved her mouth into the apex of my legs. Blood, cum and water swirl together as she drives me towards insanity with her tongue. I try to grip the walls, but my hands are no longer human, but a morphed version between paw and palm. Instead I push up and off, landing beside her. My turn. She fights me, still wanting to taste me. But my anger is outrunning my lust and with force she didn't know I had I overtake her, draping her over me and as I taste her for the first time in weeks a low carnal growl escapes my chest.
Hours later we're still in shower, but our hunger is somewhat sated. Emotions less out of control, our bodies moved back into their original form. The damage we did to each other was somewhat extensive; we were still healing, the water swirling into the drain pink. But we hold each other tightly, afraid for the embrace to end. I know once I let go she was going to go back to her mate, which, of all wolves, was the alpha Lilith of the pack.
Her and I, we were not supposed to be...

To Be Continued.
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